The more I think about it, the more it doesn’t make sense. If you want to die and you don’t care about anything anymore, why stay? Get out of your house. Leave the state. Leave the country. If you don’t care at all, leave. Do something exciting, have an adventure. Start a revolution. Visit new places, go out to get girls, party in the most insane places, search terrorists in the most James Bond way, take a knife to a gun fight to look like an idiotic badass. Just do every single thing you can. Have a fucking ball. Think about it. You were facing a 100% death rate before. Compared to that, anything seems safe. If you die in the process, you accomplish your initial goal and you get what you want. You really have nothing to lose. There is only a possibility to gain a new perspective on life. Maybe once you finish your awesome and adventurous rampage, you won’t feel like dying. You may have seen how beautiful the world really is.